The 'M' Word

The 'M' word. That dreaded word that causes millions upon millions of women to go screaming into the night, as if someone had just dropped an atomic bomb directly on them. The word? Menopause.

There, I said it. That wretched and most foul word pertaining to womanhood. While Menopause does have some very uncomfortable symptoms for many women, these are SYMPTOMS. The worst of them all (for at least 60% of the women who go through this) is when a woman starts getting hot flashes.

Hot flashes. Those wonderful range of temperature changes that can make a women feel so over-heated, that they could be in the middle of the Arctic tundra, naked and wondering why they're still sweating bullets. We all know that HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy) isn't exactly the best option, considering that it can increase a woman's risk for Breast Cancer. And, we all know that Menopause, to one degree or another, can cause a bit of weight gain in women. We also know that, due to the loss of Estrogen, that many women can become more aggressive.... some men would say they turn down right evil, as they sit on their roof holding a "Save me" sign above their head every time a helicopter flies by.


What bothers me, and I mean this REALLY bothers me, is when a woman who is going through Menopause starts chiming in with this "woe is me" bit of pablum. You've all heard this line of bull. They'll say things like:
"I'm soooo depressed. I can't have children anymore. I feel like my entire purpose on this world is gone" ... or...
"I can't take this weight gain. It's making me look so bad, and nothing fits, but I can't stop eating, and everything looks horrible on me, even black clothes don't hide my expanding curves"... or...
"What's the point of continuing with sex? I can't have children, so what's the point?"

To those women, I can only say one thing: Get your heads out of your asses and get over yourself. You're not going through some horrible life-altering phase that will render you completely useless to yourself, or anyone else, for the remainder of the time you have left on this planet. And STOP already with the woe is me crap. It's annoying as hell to everyone around you, and the only thing they want to do when you start with that is run to the nearest train station...and leave town until you get on with your life.

No one expects any woman to be 'the same' when she goes through Menopause, nor do they expect her to be 'the same' once she's post-Menopausal. That is something that is accepted globally, and something that all women around this blue and green planet can empathize with. But for the love of all the gods ever known to humanity... you 'woe is me' women have just GOT to stop with your pity party!

First of all, if you have children, and are still on this kick of thinking that your womanhood is gone because you can't have MORE children... stop that. Concentrate on the beautiful children you already have and leave it at that. Besides, in my opinion, any woman that decides to start having children after the age of 35 is simply down right bonkers and should have their head checked (and yes, I'm more than aware of how many 35+ year old women out there are swearing at me right now, but it's not like I really care if they are, as everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion).

Secondly, as much complaining and down right bitching that women do about having a period each month, one would think that NOT having periods anymore would be something to celebrate, not mourn. Yet, there are still women out there who almost literally mourn the loss of their periods.

Of course women who have no choice, due to surgical procedures that have literally forced them to stop having periods, AND, who are UNDER the age of 35...you have my understanding as to why not being able to give birth can be an emotional and/or mental issue. Other than that, no.

I'm also well aware of the fact that there are going to be women out there who may read this and think that I have no mothering experience at all. Fact: I have 4 children. So, before anyone gets on their high horses with me, here's a heads up... I've already gone down that path, and if any woman thinks for one second that raising 4 children into adulthood is even slightly easy.. kiss my ass.

For many women, even raising one child can be difficult. For other women, there can be a combination of situations that make child rearing a difficult task (which, by all accounts, is a true understatement).

We all joke about Menopause. You've all seen the main joke: "I'm still hot, it just comes in flashes now". Haha.. ugh. Now, by no means am I saying that all women who go through this are not really having some serious physical/mental/emotional issues. I'm simply stating that SOME of these women take it way over board. To me (personally), it appears to be nothing more than a means by which these women gain both attention and sympathy from friends and family members, so that they have an excuse for their behavior, and need no explanation for reacting to the natural hormonal changes that are taking place inside them.

Furthermore, I see those women as what I call "intentionally stupid". Now what I mean by this is that these women refuse to even believe their own doctors when they're told "It's normal, and all women go through this. There are plenty of treatments and support groups available to you, if you feel that you truly need some extra help getting through this stage in your life". No doctor, in his or her right mind, is going to look at a woman like that and say something along the lines of: "Well, you're right. You're the ONLY woman on the face of this planet that has ever gone through Menopause like this, and you need to be immediately transferred to the spa resort of your dreams until you are capable of handling things on your own." THINK seriously here people. It's a natural biological thing that takes place in every female body ever to walk the face of this planet...ever. It's not a damned plague.

By the way, don't think women are alone in this. Men also go through their own form of Menopause. They just get on with it better than women do. Women tend to be 'external' about most things. Meaning, they want to get it all out in the open, deal with it and move on. Men, are 'internal'. They like to think about it quite a bit before moving on with things, and rarely like to discuss much of it. This is also why men have a more difficult time handling a woman's Menopausal phase.

I will also say this: IF you are a woman who is over the age of say..40...and you want to still raise children, go down to the adoption agencies, and adopt a child. The same advice goes for any woman under the age of 35, who can not have children (for whatever reason). There are millions of children out there who need and want a good, solid and loving home. If you're so head strong on having a family... take that route.

Women who already have children, and are going through Menopause, again, in MY opinion, and who want MORE children, are simply fooling themselves. It can be seriously risky for both the woman and the unborn child. Even if the child birth goes great, it can cause serious problems afterwards for the mother, that can render her completely incapable of raising that child... or worse. So, while no one is going to stop you from having a baby after a certain age (if you're still capable of bearing children), at least take that advice into your heads and talk in great length with your doctor before starting a new line of children to carry on your family name and traditions.

It's Menopause people....deal with it. It's part of life. Get on with it. The meaning to life is to live it, not sit there and wilt into oblivion.